Contemplation
Life transformation in Contemplative Living
I am called to wholeness and integration into our community, our culture, and our society. My response to this is to be in contemplative living, the activity in daily life prompted by the gifts of the Holy Spirit.
Contemplative Living and Contemplative Prayer
I use contemplative prayer to help me with my daily life. This prayer is the development of my relationship with Christ to the point of communing beyond words, thoughts, and feelings. I move from the simplified activity of waiting upon God to the ever-increasing predominance of the gifts of the Holy Spirit as the source of my prayer.
To refresh my memory, these seven gifts of the Holy Spirit are: wisdom, understanding, counsel, fortitude, knowledge, reverence (wonder and profound adoring awed respect) and faith. With all these gifts wrapped up into one state of being, I find myself looking at Jesus face to face, talking with God in silence as One Spirit.
Two Streams of Consciousness
In living life and just being, I find myself in two steams of consciousness. My exterior life with everything and everybody that surrounds me, I find God in all things. As Matthew Kelty, O.C.S.O., says in Sermons in a Monastery, “I touch eternity and eternal life in God by the trivial things I do every day, in every breath I draw, every time I have a drink of water, …” As we are made in God’s image, I see God in my brothers and sisters. As God has made nature, I see God in the dew drop coming off a leaf blade and, in the sun, setting at the end of the day. In all this, I give thanks to God for letting me participate in God’s joy. This joy stirs my heart and allows me to go the bottom of my heart.
In my interior life, where I am silent with God in the bottom of my heart, I commune with God praying with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. It is here that I acknowledge that I don’t have to be holy to love God, I just have to be myself with all my gifts and talents but also with my faults and inadequacies as God loves just the way I am. It is here where I don’t have to be holy to see God in all things, but as Matthew Kelty says, “I only have to play as a child”, full of innocence and with an unselfish heart, devoid of pride but full of humility and reverence for my God.
I can use Lectio Divina to help me move into contemplation. There are four stages as I pray in the style of Lectio Divina: reading (a passage from the bible), meditation (reflecting and pondering upon the words from my reading), prayer (as the reflections lead my will to accept myself being in the presence of the Lord), and contemplation (as I rest in the Lord, speechless and hopefully thoughtless)
I can also use the Jesuit style of praying as I place myself in the scene as I meditate on the scripture reading.
Praying in Capernaum
As I ponder about these thoughts, I find myself in Capernaum with Jesus and the disciples. In Matthew 16, Jesus was in Caesarea Philippi and has told Peter that he will be His rock and the cornerstone of the church. In Matthew 17, Jesus has taken Peter, John and James up the mountain top and has undergone the transfiguration. Now in Capernaum in Matthew 18, Jesus finds himself with the disciples in the middle of the day. I too find myself in prayer as I participate in their meeting and talking. The dry air feels hot but there is a breeze going through my shirt. My forehead is slightly moist from sweat. I am a little tired from the walking we have been doing through the town. One of the disciples has asked Jesus,
“Who, then, is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”
2 He called a little child to him and placed the child among them. 3 And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5 And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.
As Thomas Keating explains in Open Mind, Open Heart, “A childlike attitude makes sense in this situation. You don’t have to do anything. Just rest in God’s arms. It is an exercise of just being rather than of doing. You will be able to accomplish what you have to do with much greater effectiveness and joy.”
As I rest with this explanation by Jesus, I let the gifts of the Holy Spirit envelope me and I remain quiet in my heart, in awe and full reverence for God as I let the child in me look at Jesus face to face.
References
- Bridges to Contemplative Living with Thomas Merton, Book Eight. Ave Maria Press, 2011.
- Sermons in a Monastery: Chapter Talks, by Matthew Kelty, O.C.S.O., 1983.
- Open Mind, Open Heart by Thomas Keating, 20th Anniversary Edition 2006.
Back to School
It is hard to believe that it is that time of the year already to start thinking about going to school in September. After such an odd year last year with COVID-19, our sons and daughters can expect to be at school in person this academic year. With those 12 years of age and older and who have had the COVID vaccine, they may be given the option to not wear a mask in class. However, for those 11 years of age and younger, they are going to still need to practice safe guidelines, including wearing a mask, social distancing for 6 feet and good handwashing.
Otherwise, we are back to the usual routine of getting ready to start school that first week of September (or last week of August for private schools). Here are some thoughts and tips to help you get ready:
Your son or daughter is new to the school
Meet your new teacher. One of the big questions before school starts is, “Will I like my teacher?” You can help break the ice by taking advantage of the school open house or back-to-school night event. Usually, these events are very friendly with kids’ activities to help your child feel “at home.” Around this time, teachers may also make themselves available via phone calls or email in case you need to discuss special circumstances, such as learning disabilities or food allergies, for example. Also take advantage of the school’s website so you can let your son/daughter see a picture of the new teacher.
Tour the school premises. The open house also becomes an opportunity to tour the school. Help your son/daughter familiar themselves with the classroom, hallways, bathrooms and the main office. You may also get an opportunity to see where your child may sit and what her/his desk looks like. Sitting at the desk can bring a lot comfort. Finally, seeing the playground will help him/her visualize what recess is going to look like and feel like.
Connecting with Friends. Sometimes you get lucky during the open house visit that your son/daughter will get a chance to see a familiar face or friend. Even just one friend can make all the difference in the world as odds are, they are looking forward to being in school with your son/daughter. If you happen to know if friend might be attending that school, maybe set up a playdate prior to the open house so they can talk about the school and develop a comfort level with each other.
Recall past positive experiences. Help them remember that they have had fun with other kids in previous activities, be them sports, another school or other recreational activity. Highlight for them how they were able to get over their fears or anxieties and enjoyed themselves. Self-efficacy is part of being able to visualize yourself and see yourself succeed, and memory plays a big part.
Weeks before school starts
Get Your Supplies. One of my more exciting times before school started was going with my mom to the office supply store to buy my coloring pencils, paper pads or notebooks, ruler and pens. Check with his/her teacher as to what is being recommended so your son/daughter is ready to go on day one. Let your child pick out the supplies with your guidance. Giving them the opportunity to make decisions will empower them to go to school.
Choose a backpack. Another fun item for them to pick out! Make sure it is wide enough for school supplies, has padded shoulder straps and a padded back. Teach them about all the compartments the backpack has and what to place in each one. Encourage them to keep the backpack light so talk about what goes in it and what does not belong. A good rule of thumb is that the backpack should not weight more than 10-20% of your child’s weight. Teach them how to use both straps and make sure the bottom of the backpack is at their waste line.
Getting a new lunch box. What art design will it be this year? What was the latest Pixair movie or Disney show? This is another opportunity for them to make a choice and let them buy into the excitement of going back to school. Keep the lunchbox simple and easy to use.
Minimize school work before school starts. It might be possible that you had a curriculum, perhaps a small one and at a more leisurely pace, that you followed during the summer months. This is always a great idea to maintain some academic performance and him/her ready for when school starts. However, it would be a good idea to back off and let your son/daughter have unstructured play time at least a couple weeks before school starts.
Get back to the school routine. As a family, you probably have been enjoying the sun setting down late in the evening to continue to do family and play activities. Turning the “sleep” clock back gradually over the course of 1-2 weeks is helpful as you get ready for that first day when your child has to be out the door by 730 in the morning. Go through your routine with your child and what expectations you have so as to be on time, either being on time at the bus stop or you are driving them to school.
Make the First Day a Success!
Be on time. Better yet, if you can, try to arrive to school early so you can give your son/daughter an opportunity to walk around the hallways, classroom and recall where are the bathrooms.
Make contact with the teacher. It is a good idea to touch bases with teacher at the end of the 1st day, and maybe even every day during the first week, to see how your son/daughter is integrating into the new learning environment. Check to see how friendships and cooperation are developing. Finally, this gives the teacher an opportunity to see that you are engaged and invested in your child’s success.
Traveling To and From School
Riding the school bus. Here are a few tips to ease their fears and ensure safety:
- Remind them to always board and exit the bus at locations that provide safe access to the bus or to the school building.
- They should make themselves visible to the bus driver so teach them how to look at the driver so they can see that the driver is looking at them.
- Remind your child to wait for the bus to stop before approaching it from the curb. If he/she has to cross the street to get to the bus, they should look both ways before crossing. You can work with them 1-2 weeks before school starts to teach them how to cross the street.
- Remind them that one of the rules in the bus is they should stay in their seat and not move around to chat with friends.
- Check on the school’s policy regarding food on the bus. Eating on the bus can present a problem for students with allergy and also lead to infestations of insects and vermin on the vehicles.
- If your son/daughter has food allergy problems or chronic medical conditions, make sure the school and bus driver know about these and they can have a “bus emergency plan.”
Riding in the Car. This is a good time to review the basics just in case you are taking other children:
- Children should be in a car seat with a harness for as long as possible, and then ride in a belt-positioning booster seat. Check specifications for both types of seats but some good rules of thumb for moving to the booster seat include the shoulders are above the top harness slots or their ears have reached the top of the seat.
- For older children, our State of Michigan law calls for them to be in the back seat until the age of 12 years and they reach a height of 4’ 9”. If they have outgrown their booster seat, double check that the shoulder belt lies across the chest and shoulder and not the neck or throat; and the lap belt should ride across the pelvic bones and by the thighs, and not over the stomach area.
- For those in high school, remind them to limit the number of passengers in the car to minimize distractions while driving. In the State of Michigan, the recommendation is to have no more than one non-family member in the car. Also remind them about not texting while driving, no cell-phone conversations and no alcohol-drinking. You can learn more about graduated driver’s license law from the AAP’s Healthy Children website.
Riding a bike. Follow these guidelines to ensure a safe ride:
- Practice the bike route to school before the first day of school to make sure your child can manage it.
- Make it a rule to always wear a helmet no matter how short or long the ride to and from school.
- Use the sidewalks as much as possible, and if they have to go on the road, to ride on the right side of the street, in the same direction as auto traffic and ride in bike lanes if they are present.
- Use appropriate hand signals when coming to a corner or turn.
- Respect traffic lights and stop signs.
- Wear bright-colored clothing to increase visibility. White or light-colored clothing and reflective gear is especially important after dark.
Walking to and from School.
In general, children are ready developmentally to start walking to and from school around the age ages between 9 and 11 years. But also check to see how they are doing with their impulse control. In general, younger children tend to be more impulsive and need an adult to go with them to school.
- Walking with friends and in a group is always safer than walking alone.
- Try to stay on the path or side walk where there are trained adult crossing guards, particularly as it related to crossing the streets.
- Think about dressing your children with bright-colored clothing to make them more visible to drivers.
https://www.pbs.org/parents/thrive/back-to-school-tips-for-parents
Integrating into Society as a Child of God
How do I integrate into society as a child of God?
In reviewing Ira Progoff’s, At a Journal Workshop, we each behave as if we are a water well of life that goes deep into the underground where it finds a steady stream. This stream, which connects all of us as individual wells, rejuvenates us and reenergizes us so that we go back up to the surface to make our surroundings a better place to live. This living water brings life to my soul so that I can share myself with all.
In the process of dealing with our own wells and battling our egos, we strive to find the inner truth, who we are as God made us out to be. Thomas Merton invites us to have loyalty to the truth of God’s creation: our souls as we relate to each other.
Only when the veil is broken, as St. John of the Cross says in The Living Flame, can we experience our inner truth and ourselves as spiritual beings who are made to love, to have compassion, and to have mercy. Under these circumstances, we can then integrate more easily with our community.
We can then become witnesses as the disciple John states in his first letter,
Light and Darkness, Sin and Forgiveness (1 John)
5 This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 6 If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[b] sin.Int
Water Safety This Summer
How big is the problem?
According to the CDC1, there were 3.536 fatal unintentional drownings (not boat related) per year in the United States for the 10-year period 2005-2014. About 1 in 5 were pediatric patients age 14 years and younger. About 50% of these drownings required a hospitalization or transfer to long-term care for physical, occupational and speech therapies. Many had severe brain damage that resulted in long-term brain damage including memory problems, learning disabilities, or permanent loss of basic life functioning.
When we look at the pediatric population, there are 2 main spikes in incidence in drownings and fatalities: the 1-4 year old age group and the 15 year olds and older group. When you look at the 1-4 year old age group, about 1/3 of children who died from unintentional injury were from drowning, and the most common site of drowning was the home swimming pool.
In the 15 year old and older group, most drownings occur in natural water settings (lakes, rivers, oceans). Drowning fatalities are second to motor vehicle accidents fatalities in this population. Interesting enough, as a whole, 80% of those who die from drowning are male and commonly tied to high-risk behavior.
Alcohol use among adolescents and adults is responsible for about 70% of deaths associated with water recreation. Alcohol impairs our ability to maintain balance, coordination and most important of all, our judgement.
Some Advice
So how do we make our environment safer and reduce the risk of drowning in our loved ones? The best way to do this is to have a layered approach where we have multiple steps in place to reduce the risk. From learning how to swim to having a fence around the pool, there are multiple steps we can take to make their lives safer. Here are some tips from American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) website, healthychildren.org2 and from the AAP patient education handouts3.
Water Safety at Home
- Have deadbolts on any doors that lead to water, latches that are high enough where only adults can reach.
- Never leave your child alone in the bathtub, even if it is for just a few seconds.
- Empty water from containers when you are done with your cleaning projects.
- Install locks on toilets so they remain closed. Toddlers can get theirs heads stuck in the toilet if they are curious about that water.
- Children with seizure disorder are at high risk of drowning. The most common cause for an unintentional injury to children with a seizure disorder is drowning, with the bathtub being the most common site.
Water Safety at the Pool
- Never leave children alone in your backyard where your pool may be. The best way to prevent drowning is to have an adult supervising child.
- If an adult needs to take a break or take care of something else, practice a verbal hand-off with another adult so there is a direct link with the responsibility
- Install a fence that is at least 4 feet tall around all 4 sides of the pool and not connected to the house.
- The gate to the pool should open out from the pool and have a self-close and self-latch that children can’t reach.
- Children can be tricky and fast, so think about installing window guards on windows facing the pool and reconsider using pet doors that can have access to the pool.
- Think about having rescue equipment made of fiberglass or other material that does not conduct electricity, including a shepherd’s hook (a long pole with a hook on the end).
- Have approved life jackets for their age and size, as recommended by US Coast Guard and tested by Underwriters Laboratories (UL). Avoid using “floaties” as these are not a substitute for life jackets and create a false sense of security.
- It’s a good idea to take swim lessons, and you as the parent can decide when it is best for your child to take those lessons based on their development. But remember, swim programs should not be viewed as “drown proof” for any child.
- Talk to child about diving at your pool and avoid diving in the shallow ends. As a general rule, teach them to get into unknown waters with their feet first.
- Keep riding toys away from the pool and talk about not running on the pool deck
Water Safety in the Open Water
- It’s a good idea to swim with an adult around, and definitely avoid swimming by themselves.
- Avoid diving into the water unless they know the depth of the water.
- If you are swimming on lake Michigan and get caught by a riptide, allow the current to take you out until you feel it has dissipated and remain calm. Then swallow parallel to the beach line and eventually turn in towards the beach.
- Other water hazards found near homes where you may want to keep a close eye on your child include canals, ditches, postholes, wells, fishponds and fountains
Boating Safety
- Wear an approved personal floatation device (life jacket or vest) when boating, riding a personal watercraft, fishing, water skiing or just plain playing in a river or water stream
- Avoid swimming around anchored boats, motorboat lanes or where people are waterskiing.
- Do not swim in electrical storms
In Case of an Emergency
- It’s a good idea for parents to learn CPR if you live near bodies of water, you never know when you are going to need it.
- Have pool safety and CPR instructions by the pool side.
- Always have a phone near a pool and teach your children about 911.
- Make sure rescue equipment is readily available by the pool side, including a shepherd hook, rope and a safety ring.
References:
Welcome to my blog!
Welcome. My name is John J. Spitzer, M.D., author of Finding God Again and Again. I’m so happy to have you as a visitor to my blog about my new book. This project is very special to me, and I hope to share some of that excitement with you here.
I’ll be using this blog to interact with you about Finding God Again and Again, expanding on some of the topics in it and blogging on some of the ideas related to my book. This is a great place for you to get to know me, and I’m looking forward to getting to know you, too. What did you think of Finding God Again and Again? What questions do you have for me? How do you relate to my book?
I’ll be returning here frequently with new posts and responses to feedback from you. Until next time, tell me a little bit about yourself.
